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  • Unofficial funny e-mail thread

    Ehhh . . . every now and again I get some funny forwards why not share . . . laughter is good for the body

    DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:
    40-ish...................................49
    Adventurous........................Slept with everyone
    Athletic...............................No tits
    Average looking...................Ugly
    Beautiful............................Pathological liar
    Contagious Smile.................Does a lot of pills
    Emotionally Secure..............On medication
    Feminist.............................Fat
    Free spirit...........................Junkie
    Friendship first..................Former slut
    Fun...................................Annoying
    New-Age...........................Body hair in the wrong places
    Old-fashioned....................No BJs
    Open-minded......................Desperate
    Outgoing............................Loud and Embarrassing
    Passionate........................Sloppy drunk
    Professional......................Bitch
    Voluptuous.......................Very Fat
    Large frame......................Hugely Fat
    Wants Soul mate..................Stalker

    WOMEN'S ENGLISH:
    1. Yes = No
    2. No = Yes
    3. Maybe = No
    4. We need = I want..
    5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry
    6. We need to talk = You're in trouble
    7. Sure, go ahead = You better not
    8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later
    9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron!
    10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?

    MEN'S ENGLISH:
    1. I am hungry = I am hungry
    2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
    3. I am tired = I am tired
    4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
    5. I love you = Let's have sex now
    6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
    7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you
    8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you
    9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you
    10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you
    11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay
    Disclaimer: While I have an M.D. the views I express are not to be taken as medical advice under any circumstances. Please check with your own doctor if you want medical advice as he/she has access to your info and can provide the most accurate advice.


    www.pubmed.gov . . . gotta love it

  • #2
    BEER

    Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties and local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink from any woman. Many females use a date rape drug on the market called "Beer."

    The drug is found in liquid form and is available anywhere. It comes in bottles, cans, or from taps and in large "kegs". Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and sleep with them. A woman needs only to get a guy to consume a few units of Beer and then simply ask him home for no strings attached sex.

    Men are rendered helpless against this approach. After several beers, men will often succumb to the desires to sleep with horrific looking women whom they would never normally be attracted. After drinking beer, men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that "something bad" occurred.

    At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life's savings, in a familiar scam known as "a relationship." In extreme cases, the female may even be shrewd enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer term form of servitude and punishment referred to as "marriage." Men are much more susceptible to this scam after beer is administered and sex is offered by the predatory females.

    Please! Forward this warning to every male you know. If you fall victim to this "Beer" scam and the women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter with similarly victimized men. For the support group nearest you, just look up "Golf Courses" in the phone book.

    For a video to see how beer works click here:

    Beer Demo http://www.brackenspub.com/beer.swf
    Disclaimer: While I have an M.D. the views I express are not to be taken as medical advice under any circumstances. Please check with your own doctor if you want medical advice as he/she has access to your info and can provide the most accurate advice.


    www.pubmed.gov . . . gotta love it

    Comment


    • #3
      bump for a LOL
      Disclaimer: While I have an M.D. the views I express are not to be taken as medical advice under any circumstances. Please check with your own doctor if you want medical advice as he/she has access to your info and can provide the most accurate advice.


      www.pubmed.gov . . . gotta love it

      Comment

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